Theta and Koschei
by Daleks Rule Supreme
Summary: Theta and Koschei, two Gallifreyan friends visit 18th century England in a stolen TARDIS.


**A/N:** _Hello everyone! A lot of you guys requested a Doctor Who story, and we had to oblige! We hope you enjoy this, and let us know what you think!_

**Disclaimer:** _Doctor Who does not belong to us (despite our efforts) So now we resort to fanfiction. Just kidding!_

* * *

_**Theta and Koschei**_

"Theta hurry up! The rate you're going, they'll catch us before we even reach the TARDIS!" Koschei yelled to is friend, as the two ran through the endless fields of fiery red grass of Gallifrey.

Theta yelled back, "Not all of us can run like the Daleks are behind us!"

"Well, maybe the rest of us should imagine that!" came the reply.

"They probably haven't even noticed we're gone yet!" Theta replied, breathless. "It'll take them_ at least_ two minutes to realize that, considering the fact that we're always late for class. Your fault, by the way!"

Koschei laughed. "Well maybe you should be thanking me right now!"

"Oh, _shut up!"_

* * *

A few minutes later the Time Lords reached the cluster of bushes where they had previously hidden the stolen TARDIS. It was disguised as a bush itself, and as the two best friends climbed into it, Theta said, "So were to this time?"

"Do I always have to decide?" came the reply. "Can't you _ever_ decide for yourself?"

"Okay. Let's go to Earth. How about 18th Century London? I'll just-" Theta began to extend his hand to one of the controls, but Koschei stopped him.

"Wait a minute! Who says you're going to pilot it?_ I'll_ pilot the TARDIS."

"Why? It's_ our_ TARDIS. Not yours."

"Yes, but_ I_ found it." said Koschei, unwilling to give up the fight.

"But looking for it was_ my_ idea." replied Theta, equally unwilling to accept defeat.

_"Your_ idea? You're not the genius here,_ I_ am!"

"Whatever! The point remains: this is _our_ TARDIS." Theta had to give up, or this fight would continue to the next millennium.

"Exactly, so let _me_ pilot it! Besides, the last time you piloted it, you left the brakes on!"

Theta gave his friend a confused look and said, "So?"

His friend sighed in exasperation. "So it makes a weird _vroom vroom_ sound."

"But I like that sound!"

Koschei argued, "You like weird things. Like strawberry milkshake."

"You like lemon cheesecake! What _sane_ creature likes lemon cheesecake!" Theta countered.

"Well..." his friend started before the two of them looked at each other and burst into hysterical fits of laughter.

* * *

"Enough fooling around, Theta, let's get going." Koschei ordered.

"Set the co-ordinates. Pull that lever, and push that button," Theta said, mocking is friend's bossy tone. A few second later the TARDIS disappeared from the glorious red fields of Gallifrey and reappeared in a dingy alley in 18th Century London.

As the two stepped out and surveyed their surroundings, a young woman hurrying along bumped into them, sending all three to the floor. They got up and helped the woman off the floor, who tanked them by saying, "Thank you, young masters."

Koschei seized the opportunity by saying, "You got that right. I'm the Master." He looked at Theta beside him and said, "And this is... my doctor."

Theta narrowed his eyes at him. Once the woman had walked away, he said, "_Your_ Doctor?"

Koschei shrugged. "Shut up. Next time you can call me _your_ Master."

Theta laughed. "I'd rather not."

* * *

The two boys wandered the unfamiliar streets, laughing as they planned their latest exciting scheme, and yelling at random passengers.

"Don't wait up for me!" Theta called out to an old man walking by, and Koschei added, "Listen to the Doctor, he knows what he's talking about... half the time!"

The old man gave them a confused look and just walked on, which only caused the two to laugh even harder.

* * *

A family of three living in the relatively nicer part of London was surprised in the middle of the night by the appearance of two strange young men on their doorstep. They were disheveled and bruised but there was a gleam in their eye that intrigued the woman who opened the door. They claimed they were new to the area and were lost. The younger of the two was John Smith and the other called himself Master. The man of the house gave them the only spare room and asked where they were from. A mysterious twinkle appeared in their eyes, and John Smith told them of a house beneath a snow-capped mountain and forests that seemed to blaze in the sunlight. Master told them of endless fields and majestic citadels under orange skies.

The older couple were fascinated by their tales. The two Time Lords didn't reveal much, simply described the scenes of their home. As they listened to Koschei's tales, Theta slipped something in their drinks. Once the family were snoring, the two exchanged identical wicked grins.

They then did a thorough search of the house in search of Earth money. Stuffing as much as they could in their pockets, Theta and Koschei ran out into the streets. They spent the money on anything that caught their eye - from a kitten ("Seriously, Theta?" "But it's so cute!" "You're ridiculous!" "You're heartless!" "Heartless? I have two perfectly functioning hearts!" "Brainless, then.") to books, food, and even shoes.

* * *

It was midday the next day when the two friends found their way back to the TARDIS holding crates full of souvenirs. After a lot of persuasion, Theta, convinced Koschei to bring the kitten along. Finally, the Time Lords and their kitten were on their way back to Gallifrey.

When the TARDIS landed (only a second after when they had left in Gallifrey time) they soon found themselves in the TARDIS Halls, putting the TARDIS back where it belonged before it was missed. Once they walked out, still holding more Earth souvenirs than they could manage, A few young children looked up at Theta with wide eyes. One asked, "Where did you get all this cool stuff from? It's not Gallifreyan!"

Theta, thinking quickly, replied, "Of course it's from Gallifrey. But you're just too young to have things like these. Only Seniors can have them."

Koschei nodded and added, "So scram, you little midgets!"

The midgets quickly ran away, leaving the friends in peace, their kitten meowing as it took in Gallifrey's beauty.

* * *

Around 900 years later, the Time Lord called Theta, now known as 'the Doctor', returned to 18th Century London. Here, only two days had passed since the last time he had been here. He looked completely different now. Two nights ago, he had been laughing and care free. Now he carried the burden of 900 years of Time and Space on his shoulders. He walked to the house of the people he had stolen from and left a crate of money outside their door with a note that said,

_Sorry for taking your money the other day. It was just fun. I hope this is enough._

_- John Smith_

As he walked back to the TARDIS, the Doctor cast a last, sad, longing look at the streets and wispered, "I miss you Koschei, so much. Despite everything you have done."

And with those words, he went into the TARDIS, and soon the distinct _vroom vroom_ sound of the TARDIS could be heard, and the TARDIS faded away.

* * *

**A/N:** _That was it! Let us know what you think! Reviews/Criticisms are _really _appreciated._


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